Never in a million years did I think I'd ever be writing a blog post with the above title.
Before anyone gets carried away... no, I haven't quit my day job or made any drastic life decisions. I have, however, signed up for a 10-week evening course at my local college.
After finishing my A-Levels back in 2011, I promised myself that I would never step a foot/wheel inside those premises again. I have no doubt in saying they were the worst two years of my life.
This had nothing to do with the level of work or subjects I chose. On a personal level, I had some inner demons at the time. But we've all got our own little issues tho, right...? Although the college are not entirely at fault, they did not help with the situation at all. After countless meetings with senior management and the support of Disability Cornwall, nothing ever got resolved.
Back then, my anxiety was through the roof and my whole college experience was making me ill - both physically and mentally. Not a day would go by without some form of vomit or panic attack.
One of my biggest issues still to this day, is that I bottle things up. Not even my closest of friends knew anything about this at the time. At one point, I even saw a college counsellor to try and help me with some relaxation/breathing techniques.
So after all of this, you may be thinking...
WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU GO BACK?!
The truth is, it's a course I've always been interested in. I'm going to be learning how to use Photoshop and hopefully apply these skills to my little blogging journey. I'd like to be able to edit photos better and create a more professional logo.
I'm also doing this course alongside one of my best friends, Mark. These days, I'm in a much happier and healthier mindset. I am lot more confident and with it being only part-time, I have no real ties or pressure to commit like I did before.
I paid for this course myself, so if I begin to feel any of the same anxieties, I'll have no problems in walking away... apart from the fact that I can't walk... but you know what I mean!!
I still have a very negative attitude towards the college. On week 1, we were sent to the wrong building on the opposite side of the campus and after a 30 minute wait, the lecturer was a no show.
However, things are back on track now and our first lesson last week was a success! I'm looking forward to learning new skills and hopefully get some closure on my previous bad experiences at this college.
Fingers crossed there are no mental breakdowns this time haha. It's easier to look back and laugh about it now, but there were definitely a few tears at the time.
On a more positive note, at least I've got this platform to share any stories if things go tits up again!